Strider
RVF Regular
- Joined
- Sep 28, 2023
- Messages
- 59
- Location
- White Mountains, AZ
- TOW/TOAD
- 2008 Toyota FJ Cruiser, 1980 Toyota Land Cruiser HJ45 Longbed Pickup Truck
- Fulltimer
- No
Writing this as much to vent as to hear advice and input.
I am working fifty miles from my house. An hour drive each way. Two hours a day. Ten hours per week. Forty hours per month. Four hundred hours per year (working ten months) which ads up to SIXTEEN DAYS per year... sitting in a vehicle. And that's dividing it up by 24 hours. If I was to divide it up by actual productive hours/waking hours, it would amount to about TWENTY FIVE DAYS!!!
All those hours every day, my two dogs sit and wait. I don't see them or interact with them. Add to that hours sitting at a desk. It's mostly free time, basically supervising.
I'm using the time to finish my comic about my life with a stray puppy I found years ago, to write novel, learn some animation software, and develop an animated series. But I am still tied to this building.
One thing I need to do is take breaks and just go for a walk around the huge field-that would help.
But I am still tied to that building.
The situation at home has been hell for years. Won't go into detail but a situation of emotional abuse and gaslighting. I just recently had an experience where I felt, literally, like Neo in The Matrix: waking up and seeing reality, and it was very dark. Soon after I was offered some information by someone that made me feel, again, like Neo taking the red pill. I was sick to my stomach for a whole day as I looked back and now saw things clearly. It was as if I had been trapped in a strange dreamworld-unable to wake until now.
What I am considering is getting out: selling the house and splitting it with the other, getting an RV, and boondocking. I'm looking into something like a Bigfoot, or a Super C. Not new: can't afford it, but preowned.
For now I can boondock at truck-stops near my job and park next to my job during the day. I could do a KOA long term, but boondocking will save me a good $600 per month.
If necessary, I can do that for a year. Save more money.
I also have an online job teaching, which is super easy, and doesn't pay great, but not bad.
I am an artist, as described above, but also work on leather (holsters, bags...)
I used to do murals for kids' rooms and businesses that cater to kids. Also did props and scenic art for theaters and TV productions.
I can do these things for extra income. I can maybe work short term doing props or murals in different states.
Also, I am a certified off road instructor. With my Land Cruiser in tow, I can give private and group instruction.
My idea is to convert the bedroom of the RV into a small workshop and sleep in the living room area. Have a storage unit to keep some things, and which I can go to for resupply or perhaps making something more involved whenever needed.
I have an old Land Cruiser that I would like to two, preferably on a trailer (thus the Super C idea).
I would like to have a small cabin on a piece of land out of town eventually.
It's a little scary: the thought of eventually leaving this job to boondock. Insurance. Etc.
But it's also scary to think of the missed days of being on the road, camping somewhere. Seeing the blue sky and the sun. Even seeing the rain and snow.
Scarier still is the idea of just wasting days until retirement, if I make it that long, to then just get by.
I had a high school English teacher who had a sailboat, and his dream was to sail, I believe it was to sail to Australia and back from Florida, or around the world. Regardless, he had the sailboat. He had everything set up.
His retirement cam and he was going to set out, but the district offered him a higher pay and retirement if he would do another few years-four or five I think it was. He accepted. Made a good amount more money, and earned a considerably higher retirement payment. And so he finished that time, and it was time to sail!
He never even made it to the sea. He died at home a few weeks before the journey was to start.
I have always remembered that: those last four or five years could have been spent at sea. He may even have had longer with the freedom.
I had a good friend. His mother died and left him a fully paid house in South Florida, along with about $800,000. His father died and left him about $250,000. He had a 1971 Barracuda he was restoring.
He was offered about $400,000 for the house, but he refused to accept it because it had been "worth" like $700,000 during the bubble. He was offered somewhere around $200,000 for the Cuda, but her refused because it was worth much more fully restored.
I told him several times to sell the dam house, get an RV and a trailer, and travel with the Cuda.
The Cuda had been an albatross around his neck for a few decades: the constant struggle to get it done right etc.I told him why not just sell it and live, but he said "that a-hole that offered him 200k would restore it and sell it for 500k. I asked if he was gonna spend the $50,000 plus it would probably take to restore that thing to make it worth 500k, and if not, take the money and run. Enjoy life.
HE wouldn't. He chose instead to spend his days leting old punk rocker friends stay at his house, drink and smoke and eat crappy food. Play music, but just as a hobby.
We lost contact for a while.
One day I called him. He was an artist too and I proposed we team up. I wanted to develop an animated series and some other things. We could work together.
He took my call in the hospital, waiting for heart surgery the next morning. They needed to replace a valve because his smoking etc. had messed him up with weight gain and other issues.
His surgery was scheduled for around 6AM the next morning. It was about 7PM when we spoke.
He said he's call me as soon as he was out of recovery so we could discuss this.
Two days later I got the call: my friend died on the operating table, He was 48 years old.
That was that.
Car, house, inheritance, everything stayed behind. All of it. He had no will so I think the state stole it all.
The stress I have gone through, at home and in teaching with the constant disrespect and abuse has aged me. And I wonder what the hell is staying at a job worth. Getting an RV and boondocking and trying to do a business is a risk, but so is not doing it.
Kind of feels like losing the brakes on a car heading towards a 1,000 foot drop, and worrying about the risk of jumping out over staying in the car for that long fall.
God gave me a talent and I think I have squandered it. "Plan B" has been a sabotage, actually, because it has been the safety cushion preventing me from risking.
To put things in perspective: I have been homeless. I have spent years struggling just to keep my nose above water. I have been in education and seen how teachers have become expendable: having less and less authority while being given more and more responsibility and blame. I worked in Florida as a graphic artist and seen how I, and others, were used: hired for a time and then fired without cause or warning. I am just tired of it.
Having to work while in the RV, I can take a break and take my dogs outside, go for a short walk, etc.
I figure just the RV alone, staying at the current job, is a big step forward. I am not tied down. I've been in a situations before where I lose a job and then, like most other people, am restricted to the general area to find another job-that or break a lease, pay through the nose to leave or have my credit damaged... settling for whatever is within commute distance.
With the RV I can at least find a job pretty much anywhere.
But my goal is to work remotely.
I am still figuring this out, but just wanted to express myself. Maybe this will help someone else. Maybe someone will give me good advice.
Either way, I just want to express what I am going through.
I am working fifty miles from my house. An hour drive each way. Two hours a day. Ten hours per week. Forty hours per month. Four hundred hours per year (working ten months) which ads up to SIXTEEN DAYS per year... sitting in a vehicle. And that's dividing it up by 24 hours. If I was to divide it up by actual productive hours/waking hours, it would amount to about TWENTY FIVE DAYS!!!
All those hours every day, my two dogs sit and wait. I don't see them or interact with them. Add to that hours sitting at a desk. It's mostly free time, basically supervising.
I'm using the time to finish my comic about my life with a stray puppy I found years ago, to write novel, learn some animation software, and develop an animated series. But I am still tied to this building.
One thing I need to do is take breaks and just go for a walk around the huge field-that would help.
But I am still tied to that building.
The situation at home has been hell for years. Won't go into detail but a situation of emotional abuse and gaslighting. I just recently had an experience where I felt, literally, like Neo in The Matrix: waking up and seeing reality, and it was very dark. Soon after I was offered some information by someone that made me feel, again, like Neo taking the red pill. I was sick to my stomach for a whole day as I looked back and now saw things clearly. It was as if I had been trapped in a strange dreamworld-unable to wake until now.
What I am considering is getting out: selling the house and splitting it with the other, getting an RV, and boondocking. I'm looking into something like a Bigfoot, or a Super C. Not new: can't afford it, but preowned.
For now I can boondock at truck-stops near my job and park next to my job during the day. I could do a KOA long term, but boondocking will save me a good $600 per month.
If necessary, I can do that for a year. Save more money.
I also have an online job teaching, which is super easy, and doesn't pay great, but not bad.
I am an artist, as described above, but also work on leather (holsters, bags...)
I used to do murals for kids' rooms and businesses that cater to kids. Also did props and scenic art for theaters and TV productions.
I can do these things for extra income. I can maybe work short term doing props or murals in different states.
Also, I am a certified off road instructor. With my Land Cruiser in tow, I can give private and group instruction.
My idea is to convert the bedroom of the RV into a small workshop and sleep in the living room area. Have a storage unit to keep some things, and which I can go to for resupply or perhaps making something more involved whenever needed.
I have an old Land Cruiser that I would like to two, preferably on a trailer (thus the Super C idea).
I would like to have a small cabin on a piece of land out of town eventually.
It's a little scary: the thought of eventually leaving this job to boondock. Insurance. Etc.
But it's also scary to think of the missed days of being on the road, camping somewhere. Seeing the blue sky and the sun. Even seeing the rain and snow.
Scarier still is the idea of just wasting days until retirement, if I make it that long, to then just get by.
I had a high school English teacher who had a sailboat, and his dream was to sail, I believe it was to sail to Australia and back from Florida, or around the world. Regardless, he had the sailboat. He had everything set up.
His retirement cam and he was going to set out, but the district offered him a higher pay and retirement if he would do another few years-four or five I think it was. He accepted. Made a good amount more money, and earned a considerably higher retirement payment. And so he finished that time, and it was time to sail!
He never even made it to the sea. He died at home a few weeks before the journey was to start.
I have always remembered that: those last four or five years could have been spent at sea. He may even have had longer with the freedom.
I had a good friend. His mother died and left him a fully paid house in South Florida, along with about $800,000. His father died and left him about $250,000. He had a 1971 Barracuda he was restoring.
He was offered about $400,000 for the house, but he refused to accept it because it had been "worth" like $700,000 during the bubble. He was offered somewhere around $200,000 for the Cuda, but her refused because it was worth much more fully restored.
I told him several times to sell the dam house, get an RV and a trailer, and travel with the Cuda.
The Cuda had been an albatross around his neck for a few decades: the constant struggle to get it done right etc.I told him why not just sell it and live, but he said "that a-hole that offered him 200k would restore it and sell it for 500k. I asked if he was gonna spend the $50,000 plus it would probably take to restore that thing to make it worth 500k, and if not, take the money and run. Enjoy life.
HE wouldn't. He chose instead to spend his days leting old punk rocker friends stay at his house, drink and smoke and eat crappy food. Play music, but just as a hobby.
We lost contact for a while.
One day I called him. He was an artist too and I proposed we team up. I wanted to develop an animated series and some other things. We could work together.
He took my call in the hospital, waiting for heart surgery the next morning. They needed to replace a valve because his smoking etc. had messed him up with weight gain and other issues.
His surgery was scheduled for around 6AM the next morning. It was about 7PM when we spoke.
He said he's call me as soon as he was out of recovery so we could discuss this.
Two days later I got the call: my friend died on the operating table, He was 48 years old.
That was that.
Car, house, inheritance, everything stayed behind. All of it. He had no will so I think the state stole it all.
The stress I have gone through, at home and in teaching with the constant disrespect and abuse has aged me. And I wonder what the hell is staying at a job worth. Getting an RV and boondocking and trying to do a business is a risk, but so is not doing it.
Kind of feels like losing the brakes on a car heading towards a 1,000 foot drop, and worrying about the risk of jumping out over staying in the car for that long fall.
God gave me a talent and I think I have squandered it. "Plan B" has been a sabotage, actually, because it has been the safety cushion preventing me from risking.
To put things in perspective: I have been homeless. I have spent years struggling just to keep my nose above water. I have been in education and seen how teachers have become expendable: having less and less authority while being given more and more responsibility and blame. I worked in Florida as a graphic artist and seen how I, and others, were used: hired for a time and then fired without cause or warning. I am just tired of it.
Having to work while in the RV, I can take a break and take my dogs outside, go for a short walk, etc.
I figure just the RV alone, staying at the current job, is a big step forward. I am not tied down. I've been in a situations before where I lose a job and then, like most other people, am restricted to the general area to find another job-that or break a lease, pay through the nose to leave or have my credit damaged... settling for whatever is within commute distance.
With the RV I can at least find a job pretty much anywhere.
But my goal is to work remotely.
I am still figuring this out, but just wanted to express myself. Maybe this will help someone else. Maybe someone will give me good advice.
Either way, I just want to express what I am going through.
